


they say it's darkest before the dawn

by cantfoolajoker (lichmutual)



Category: Persona 4, Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Canonical Character Death (mentioned), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Light Horror, M/M, Nightmares, Persona 5 Spoilers, Police Brutality (mentioned), unreality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:55:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22127485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lichmutual/pseuds/cantfoolajoker
Summary: Akira was known to have bad nightmares.
Relationships: Kurusu Akira/Narukami Yu, Persona 4 Protagonist/Persona 5 Protagonist
Comments: 2
Kudos: 67





	they say it's darkest before the dawn

Akira was known to have bad nightmares.

He never usually got them during sleepovers with others, but that was purely because he was so anxious about falling asleep then he wouldn’t ever sleep for the full length, generally going between hour intervals. He’d always gotten nightmares since he was a child and before everything that happened, but after being arrested and the year he spent in Tokyo, he felt they only got worse in their contents.

Suddenly it wasn’t out of reach things anymore. Sure, everyone occasionally had the wacky dream they couldn’t explain, even if it was refusing to look at a monster knowingly that it couldn’t hurt you unless you looked at it. Akira had become self-aware like that, though granted, when he woke up he was never certain if he was truly aware of it or if it happened so many times the dream version of himself just always acknowledged that as a fact in order to calm himself down.

Sometimes, he was in the interrogation chair. His wrists were bound and he knew no matter how much he struggled, he wasn’t going to break free this time around. The hits came from all angles, unable to pin one specific source that was causing him so much ache and pain, and the only thing he could make out from it all was the pinch from a needle and the following dizziness that came over him. His head felt like it was filled with cotton whenever he woke up, fuzzy like the static of a television screen.

Sometimes, he was in Mementos. He’d be with his friends and then in a blink of an eye, he was alone. Was it a wrong turn? Had they gotten caught up in a fight? He’d wander through the winding tunnels, the darkness making his heart rate spike, the anxiety of the unknown getting the best of him. He knew what would happen if he stepped into the shadows. He didn’t want to venture too far, but the darkness always closed in on him and the dark always won. When he woke up, he would pull his phone out and turn the flashlight on, and despite the ache and watering from his eyes and his body yelling at him to turn the light off, he knew he would never be satisfied unless he made sure.

Sometimes— and these were the real kicker moments for Akira— he’d be in the boiler room again. He was never in his thief outfit, and there was never anyone else present except for  _ him. _

The moment of Goro Akechi’s death played on repeat in his mind. He’d saved a lot of people, he’d been informed of that, from getting Haru out of an abusive relationship to simply keeping Ryuji in check and in school and not dropping out as he had planned. Akechi had been the one that slipped through his fingers while holding on to everyone else. There was never a time where his mind didn’t whisper to him what could have happened behind the lock barrier, projecting different images of how his body laid there cold and alone without anyone to help him.

Those were nights Akira needed a few hour break. Despite the tightness in his head at the idea of not just going back to sleep, he knew he could never do that. If he did, he’d just return to the same scene again and again, like a movie only paused for the time being that would resume when he sat back down to endure it once more. 

He immediately turned the brightness on his phone down, tucking in closer to him so his bedmate wouldn’t be woken up by the light. Thankfully they were spooning, with Akira relaxing back into him so as to not wake him up with his sudden absence. He scrolled through his phone aimlessly, checking up on different social media sites at around four o’clock in the morning if the clock on his phone read the truth. The tight feeling in his head didn’t go away, and his eyes watered at the light, but he pushed through.

It was around five o’clock he felt the arm around his waist tighten and his fiancé’s head press into the back of his neck before shifting to rest his chin on his shoulder.

“What’re you looking at?” Yu asked, voice slurred with sleep.

Akira shrugged, putting the screen to sleep immediately so as to not hurt Yu’s eyes like he’d been doing to himself. “Just stuff.”

Yu yawned. “Had a nightmare?” he guessed, eyes closing as he pulled Akira closer and nestled his head closer.

Akira hummed. “Maybe.”

“You can just wake me up, you know.”   


“Yeah, but-”

“No buts,” Yu cut in, squeezing Akira as he spoke. 

“Not even mine?” Akira asked, chuckling airily to direct the conversation off of him.

“Haha, very funny,” Yu responded dryly, still having not opened his eyes. “Just try and get some more sleep, and if you need me, I’m here.” With that, he pressed a kiss to his temple and inhaled deeply, settling back to sleep himself after adjusting to rest his chin on top of the curly mop of hair on Akira’s head.

Akira huffed and set his phone back on the side table, trying his hardest not to dislodge himself from Yu as he did so. He did close his eyes and try to go back to sleep, and to his credit, he did.

Though his dreams still haunted him. He could never escape them.  _ Just wake up, _ he told himself.  _ Wake up. _

And he did wake up, but it felt off and felt wrong. Akira’s heart pounded at knowing he’d just been faked out, his own anxiety spawning a second nightmare in some sort of weird inception to make himself think he’d woken up. He could never escape. 

_ Just wake up. _

He got out of his empty bed despite his better judgment, exploring the cold and dark apartment that was usually a home to him but felt more like the set of a horror movie where he didn’t know what was around the corner. Everything looked the same yet it all felt wrong, making Akira’s skin crawl as he peered into the hallway and was unable to see the living room.

_ Wake up. _

He heard shuffling in the dark. Was it Yu? Maybe Morgana? One of their mutual friends? Akira couldn’t tell. Even if he’d had his glasses on, he doubted his ability to see what was beyond the line that had been drawn. He heard what sounded like a pan being hit against in their kitchen. He gripped the door frame until his knuckles turned white, breathing through his mouth to calm himself down. He didn’t feel any calmer.

_ Wake up. _

He took shaky steps forward. Akira knew it was a joke his curiosity would get him killed, but he felt like he was walking straight to his death. His body didn’t stop him though no matter how much his brain told him to stop. To turn around. To go back to bed and put his back to the door and curl up and hope he’d properly wake up soon enough. 

The darkness never cleared up. The line was becoming increasingly apparent. The blue light trickling through the bedroom windows didn’t apply to the living room windows. Akira’s breath was ragged, his chest aching and his palms sweaty and his blood had run cold like the floorboards beneath his feet.

Reaching out a hand, something grabbed him back.

_ “Akira!” _

Jolting, Akira nearly missed elbowing Yu in the face as he violently retracted his arm.

Everything was yellow now. It had to have been six in the morning now, the sun rising behind the blinds and only a few rays escaping to illuminate the room well enough to see.

“Akira, honey,” Yu spoke, voice soft and gentle and alert, and he brought one of his hands down Akira’s outstretched arm and laced their fingers together. He pulled his arm back close to him, pressing it to Akira’s chest so he could wrap his arm around him as well. Akira could feel his heart about to beat out of his chest.

“It’s alright,” Yu assured him, enveloping him in his warmth. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Akira’s voice was thick. “Not really,” he responded, feeling tears fall down his cheeks that he hadn’t realized were at his eyes.

Yu hummed, not pushing him any further, and he only nudged him to roll over, which Akira did. He pulled him close so Akira could burrow into his chest and away from everything else, and Akira accepted it, gripping the front of Yu’s sleep shirt carefully as he sniffled and tried his hardest not to cry.

Yu continued to assure him, rubbing his back and trying to hum a lullaby that he always made up on the spot to comfort Akira. It never made sense and Yu usually forgot what his original tune was, but Akira loved it nonetheless. He loved him.

“Can you make me coffee?” Akira asked, voice raspy and quiet, but his grip tightened on his shirt. “Not right now. Later.”

“Of course,” Yu responded, having not even made a move to leave like he’d expected the add on clarification. “Of course.”

The two laid like that for a while. Akira was unable to think about getting a peaceful sleep, forcing his eyes open every few minutes so he would stay awake and not drift off while he was resting his eyes. He thrived in the comfort of Yu however, embracing every last bit of his warmth that he was willing to provide.

“I love you,” Yu told him, breaking the silence.

“I love you too,” Akira responded, and he relaxed further into his arms, savoring the moment and putting the darkness behind him in favor of the light Yu always gave off that guided him back home.

**Author's Note:**

> as the tags say i wrote this instead of sleeping lol. 
> 
> title comes from sunset by the midnight, which i had in the background as i wrote this. this was also super self-indulgent. if you made it this far, i hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
